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I think partly because it seems like such a distant haze, but also because I have such a visceral post-traumatic reaction to the whole thing. It was not my perfect birth plan.
A little thorn in my side that irritates me when my mind wanders to that date. The date that was meant to be the best day of my life, and yet I was left drugged, scared and confused. If this post helps at least one mother who has experienced anything like what I went through and feels some sense of peace and that they are not alone, then my job is done.
October 8th, my husband and I packed our bags for the hospital. Beyond overwhelmed, ecstatic and ignorantly ready to be parents. I say that because a first time parent is completely ill-equipped for this next phase of their life.
No book, having a niece, or class can ever prepare you for what is about to come. Now, let me rewind to two weeks prior when we heard this news.
I was waiting patiently in the OB office which all you moms out there know can be hours, so patience really is a virtue ready for my last check up before meeting my beautiful, perfect daughter.
I had done it all. I attended 12 hypnobirthing classes, hired a doula to work with us and I was adamant that I was absolutely having no drugs which was very in sync with the motto of our household.
We were very seriously considering a home birth or a birthing centre. Images, like Kourtney Kardashian yes, I saw the episode where she heroically pulls her child from inside her out into the world like a primal animal and Gisele talking about how her drugless birth was pain free.
I felt like I had completely failed. I was just a vessel. I began to mourn my failure and loss. This was not my birth plan. I remember vividly when I left him and walked into the freezing room. It was confusing and it was foreign.
It hit me like a ton of bricks that I was alone. I was alone in this. This was not the warm image I had in my head with family around me, candles lit and my doula chanting some exciting words of encouragement. And I was scared.
They injected a needle the size of my arm into my spine.If you have a credit score to the left of perfect, you still have plenty of great card choices.
which are NOT mine. But these criminals have my Date of birth, my mother’s maiden name, my social security number, my high school information, and even the name of my first pet! I cannot seem to stop him! It makes me so damn mad.
But my. My Not So Perfect Life by Sophie Kinsella Overview - NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER - Part love story, part workplace drama, this sharply observed novel is a witty critique of the false judgments we make in a social-media-obsessed world. 50 Unconventional First-Date Ideas.
So, even if the date is bad, you’ll at least feel like your time wasn't wasted. The length of a minute ferry ride is the perfect bite-sized date. My perfect first date happened with my current boyfriend.
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